Frumtastic...that's me! ;)

I recently came across a post for a new E-book launched called "Frumps to Pumps" by Sarah Mae featuring motivational and devotional readings to help moms get out of the "frump slump" as the author puts it! Honestly I'm not sure I'm quite ready to throw my comfy fleecy pants and T-shirts and tank tops out the window with my routine consisting of frequent nursing and spit up...but I am appreciative of Sarah Mae's taking the lead to guide moms to the vision of why it's important that we get dressed. I've started reading her E-book, which is FREE! Go get your copy if you haven't already, and I'm definitely going to tuck this into my arsenal of motivating resources to pull up later. I feel like I'm in such an awkward clothing stage still, needing to hide the post-pardum pooch, feed the baby on demand and try to be comfortable and productive. When I do go out, I find myself wearing just about the same things on a very shallow rotation basis though...so that's where this post comes in. Sarah Mae is giving away by random drawing one $500 shopping spree to Target! Can you imagine the possibilities?! Ok, so chances of winning are slim with so many eager entries I'm sure, but it doesn't hurt to try and hope. And at least the E-book is available to all, so click on the link and check it out. I also read her E-book 31 Days to Clean and benefited greatly from her guidance on motivating mothers to keep their home a place to love others well. I also have to say that Sarah Mae's blog posts and resources are worth looking into and following as she seeks God to lead other moms through common struggles with her positive perspective, scripture and motivating E-books.

Here's the link to Frumps to Pumps! Enjoy! :)

http://sarahmae.com/stretchingintoblue/2012/03/replace-your-frumptastic-wardrobe-frumps-to-pumps-launch-and-giveaway/

Post Pardum Priorities

I'll refrain from self-depricating apologies about my infrequent blog posts...again. I've been taking everything in stride and focusing on what I believe are my priorities for post-pardum, mothering and homemaking that is manageable for me at this time. That said, I'm still working on the compilation of my Home Management Binder, but I have made progress. It will be picture worthy when I finally decorate the cover and fill it all out...TBA...But no pressure I keep telling myself. I was previously feeling like a beginner swimmer treading water in a deep ocean shortly after my third was born and all the helpful family train of visitors went home leaving me a lone...ALONE...with 3 very dependent darlings...

You know that place where you just know you're in awkward transition, like a valley that's overwhelming with walls towering above you...

Well that was me for a while, but now I can honestly say that I'm working my way out of that feeling...Not that I can trust my feelings, but I finally feel like I'm back...or at least making a come back...haha. I finally felt this way about 3 months after my son was born. It's now only about 4 weeks later....haha. Of course the challenges abound continually with the children needing me profusely, but I mean, what a blessed life...

And yet to have my hands blessedly full with so much responsibility...it's a little daunting and sobering and makes a woman/mother/wife feel a certain calling that needs more than just what I can do.

That's why I've been seeking to find what will keep me well and able to serve me family, while not burning out...in otherwords to maintain my joy while managing the family...

This post won't even scratch the surface, but it's a little more uplifting than previous confessions of the valley...which is of course where streams abound as the real source of wellness and JOY is in Christ Himself, spending time in His presence and feeding on Him as my supply (I could write a whole post on this).

But for now I'm talking about practical action, my daily choices and habits, finding a ballance in still crossing things off the TO-DO list, maintaining my energy through the day and being fully in the moment with my kids...involved in their activities. This is TALL order, if you ask me. I fail often honestly.

BUT, the plan is to make small goals to keep myself accountable to what I want to accomplish and just keep at it!
The following selection of pictures represents areas in which I've been making manageable goals that help me during the day.

#1 Nutrition and cooking. I could write an abundance on this. In fact, it's my personal dream to one day regularly update a food blog. Now, I'm not an expert and I'm not really absolute either about cutting out this or that...but I tlook for healthy alternatives and research the best foods that will give me the best energy so I can give more of myself to the people I love, as well as feed my family properly. Right now I'm crazy about my new smoothie concoction that gets me started everyday.

I've been so inspired by recipies on Pinterest too--I could write a whole post on this as well, but before I digress, let me go on to the next priority...

2. Crafting, cooking and creating with my kids! I sometimes have a slew of excuses for why it's too much for me to do this or that, but then I think when are we going to it if now when they are young and I'm home with them. I've decided the tornado blown house look will have to endure for the sake of the kids having these kinds of joys while they are little. This picture is a classic potato painting project...does that bring back happy memories from childhood or what?

Doing little projects with the kids brings me into their world to see how they respond, react and light up to new ideas, creations and play times. Right now, one my son's favorite activities is baking or cooking with me after his 2 little siblings go down for naps or bed...we don't do it everyday, but I realize these are times we will both look back on fondly.

3. A little ME time that energizes and refreshes me to cope...

No, I don't have a box of chocolate covered strawberries to go to often, but this picture capturing a totally unexpected surprise in the mail from my dear husband symbolizes that need to just reach for some chocolate for a mother's heart now and then, whether it be actual chocolate, a bath, time reading inspirational blogs, time with a friend...etc.

4. Pursuing hospitality

And as crazy as it sometimes seem, I want to continue to pursue hospitality (at least host our Friday night Bible study dinner and adopt any young high school or college orphans looking for a home. Believe me, it's a huge help and supply to have someone else come to our home, as long as they don't mind the choas and real family life in action...hehe...and I love it when the table that is usally laden with papers, playdough and plaster...is cleared for company with a fresh table cloth (vinyl mind you.)...Awwwwww...it's like a breath of fresh air.

A bowl full of lemons.: Weekly challenge #1 - The home management binder

Monthly challenge #1 - The home management binder: We all wish we could run a smooth household, but sometimes life catches up to us and things slip away. We then begin accumilating "pile-up...

This is what I need to do...I am inspired. I don't promise to do it tomorrow, but by the end of this month, I shall endeavor to complete and get rolling with my updated, handy dandy, easy-to-use Home Management Binder...that is a goal. Here's the link http://abowlfulloflemons.blogspot.com/2011/01/weekly-challenge-1-home-management.html?showComment=1327906176734#c1230298732096117877

Raise the water, Lord!

I'm not sure what to title this...since I've dropped the ball on blogging for a while. Will all my blog posts begin with humble confessions of my blogtardedness? Perhaps...bear with me dear few readers that are out there. This is where I basically tell it like it is, hiding nothing, trying not to impress or express perfection or even on top of it-ness. haha. And yet, there are so many emotions brewing in my heart, some extremely positive and others like a cloud of overwhelming-ness and self-deprecation.
Dwelling on the more rosy sentiments, I'm a new mommy again...blessed to look after 3 beautiful children now, bright-eyed and bushy tailed little monkeys that keep me huffing and puffing morning to night. How can I be so blessed with this much responsibility? I often consider the extreme preciousness of these little ones pondering the miracle that their Maker felt to bestow them to my care here on earth. Little wisps of hair to brush out of my daughters' eyes, nose kisses, hugs, stories, first phrases to experience, toddler laughter, a growing son who has developed leaps and bounds in just a few short months and a tiny perfect 2 month newborn cooing in my arms or suckling at my breast...how could I ask for more?
And yet too often I find myself yeilding to the gloomy gravitational pull of the thoughts "If only I could keep the house in better shape, if only I could get my cards mailed, if only I could stay on top of the laundry before it takes over the house, if only I could keep my cool and remain patient when one of the three tests mommy's limits to the ends of the earth...sigh. If only I could be a better wife like June Cleaver (ideally) and have supper on the table and an immaculate home for my deserving husband to experience each night, if only I could return library dvds on time without them mysteriously missing in the most random places having been carried off by mischievous monkeys...imagine that!

And there's the list of inadvertently placing the blame elsewhere...If only my husband didn't have to work so much, if only he could come home at a consistent time each night so I could know what to expect, if only my daughter would stay dressed all day and not shed her selected clothing for her prefered birthday suit while yelling "GO POTTY"...when actually she's not even ready to relinquish her diaper days. If only my newborn could sleep through the night leaving me at least some consistent stretch of dependable rest, if only my son wasn't so strong-willed and intense ready to blow like a volcano at times, if only my children could play quietly together and resist the inevitable law that attracts the other child to whatever the first child is playing with, consequently resulting in high pitched screams of protest and territorial barks and an occasional push landing the offender in a time out battle...while mommy "was" trying to get a decent dinner ready for the family before it boiled over or became burned (sometimes)....ahahahahaha...and now I have to pause to laugh. Am I pathetic? Maybe. Sure this scenario doesn't happen to So and So or So and So...why they make raising 3 young children look like cake and oh if only I was more organized like So and So...

I do try to be...

so what's wrong with me?

Really, I can't complain...I know it's not that bad.
That was just a little recapitulation of the darts of the enemy sweeping through my brain through the day...and then the light came...after a turn of heart.

A little sitting at the feet of my Father...uh...hello?
I was reminded of a story of a man in a boat braving a trecherous stretch of rocky water. It seems the boat was floating just fine until the man came to a large obstructive boulder blocking him from continual passage. The man, in an attempt to turn to God, logically cried out "Lord, remove the boulder so I can pass by smoothly!" The response came "No, I will not remove the boulder. It will remain. What I can do for you is raise the water so you can pass over the boulder." In other words, "My GRACE is sufficient for you! My power is perfected in weakness."
When the boulder intimidates, the responsibilities abound, the complications surmount and the feeling of overwhelming-ness ensues...

THERE IS ONE WHO CAN RAISE THE WATER!

So I have a new perspective. Life is beautiful just as it is...looking past the bags under my eyes, there's a happy heart, a thankful heart. Looking beyond the messes that pile up around the house mocking me with their multiplicity and tenaciousness, is a lived-in home where children thrive, create, and play. As evidenced by all the laundry in process, there is no lack for clothing by way of generous hand-me-downs for the children, and when peace is interrupted with a loud screech of protest of immature expression, there are valuable teaching opportunities to be had.

And in those moments when I feel like I just might lose it when the boulder begins to emerge in my view like the tip of an iceberg, I take a deep breath, maybe 2...and say:

"Lord, raise the water!"

A little bit of harvest reflection...

I've been mia in blogging land lately...I have no real excuse except I have been insanely busy coupled with intensely tired and incompacitated at times. I've been easily overwhelmed and struggling to STOP and live in the moment while I have it rather than stress about the future little pumpkin coming our way, the physical capacity that I'm losing and the changes that are imminent.
I'm exercising to see past the chaos and clutter and find joy and thankfulness in the heap of responsibilies I feel so inadaquate to accomplish.
The children are my world right now.
Raising them, training them, guiding them.
It's 7:00 a.m.
I didn't sleep well last night because of heartburn and other factors. I crashed early on and didn't fulfill normal household responsibilies before bed. Now it's a new day.
I step over scattered toys to a crumb filled countertop to rummage through a dish-filled sink
for a sippy cup to wash and fill for the little one's milk.
I quickly make a peanut butter sandwich for my son's lunch because it's practically the only thing he'll eat.
I step into the livingroom laden with miscellaneous articles of clothing
I had previously folded but that now currently lay ransacked on the floor.
I calm the temper tantrum of my 3 year old because his eggs are cooked too hot
and gently remind him to use his big boy words to express himself and just blow on them and wait till they cool down.
I encourage him to go put on his clothes and shoes to get ready for preschool.
My little one starts screaming that she's done! And it's time for the challenge of dressing her while she opts to wiggle and bounce on the bed instead of helpfully holding still.
And I run to my own room to quickly put on something decent to wear over my large eggplant 9 month pregnant shape,
And I hear screams of conflict in the other room as the children deliberately antangonize one another and my oldest barks commands at his sister and she replies in a fisty defensive manner.
And I go in to separate them, delegate duly deserved time-out and words of correction and guidance.
And it's time to load the van.
It's always a battle getting out the door.
But we do it somehow.
And I breathe...and I sing...and I exercise to turn my wandering, distracted heart to the Lord as I drive.

And I find myself wondering...how am I going to do this with 3 kids, Lord?

And I think of this sunflower...and growth and lessons in nature that teach me to look for the everyday beauty in the daily chaos and conumdrum of living in the moment rather than just merely rushing through a routine.
I know these days are precious.
I need to savor them,
Thank the Lord for them,
And not let them go without seeing the beaming brightness in the shadows.

Here's a little harvest photography from our recent visit to the pumpkin farm. Growth and God's design is illustrated in the magnificent development of these bright orange products of the vine! I observed a couple of interesting parallels to humanity in this

here pumpkin patch.
For example, pumpkins are much like children.
No one has the same shape or characteristics. They are all different expressions of growth and personality.

Secondly, their vibrant, delightful, healthy and attractive color is a result of their abiding on that vine, where the growth can take place in the nurturing design of God the Father--that would be a lesson to me to remember where the life supply is always found!

And speaking of new life, here I am waiting for my little 3rd pumpkin to arrive...anytime in the next couple of weeks! :)

An Attitude of Gratitude...

I haven't blogged in a while, my steady stream of writing seems to having been thwarted by a drought in the the way of energy and stamina this summer...not that I haven't had multitudinous events and matters to blog about. I could blog about how my baby boy (we found out it's a boy!) is an answer to my 3 year old son's prayer for a little brother and that he kicks and giggles my belly all the time much to the delight of my older child who is very excited about this pregnancy. I could blog about how I've been feeling both fortunate and blessed to be at home with my children this summer, yet honestly overwhelmed and doubting my capacity to tote a third around in addition to my very busy, unpredictable other two. I could blog about the places we've visited and the painting projects we've done, all in an effort to stay busy and redeem our precious time before these fleeting days fly by in flurry. I could blog about how we've reached a crossroads with naps...perhaps it could be described as being between a rock and a hard place where my son no longer embraces his opportunity to slumber in the afternoon, but still shows evidence of emotional need for that extra sleep. I could blog about how I NEED those naps to happen for my own well-being and stamina to be preserved through the whole day, and how I told my husband that I feel like a popsicle that melts by a certain time, losing all probable functionality and patience, sadly if I don't at least a cat nap during the day. I could blog about how my husband, who I really depend on greatly, has been called to serve literally around the clock from about 7am - 2am on some days (it's just been 15 hour days this past week, otherwise it's just been later and unpredictable dinners throughout the summer) to meet a deadline for some new equipment and renovations for the practical maintainance and upgrading of a facility that hosts and provides a Bible training program for hundreds of young Christ seeking college graduates. I could admit too that I've been exposed just how self-seeking I feel during his weeks of his pouring out in his service to the Lord. I could also reflect on the process of letting the Lord in to my feelings and adjusting my attitude to open my heart where it was previously too occupied with my own needs to see the beauty of my portion as a mother and wife to a serving brother.
And that is what I feel to focus on in this post:
TAKING MY PORTION WITH THANKSGIVING.
I was watered by a hymn at the beginning of the summer #595
There is always something over,
When we from the Father's hand,
Take our portion with thanksgiving,
Praising for the things He's planned,
Satisfaction full and deepening,
Ever issues from His store,
To His own He gives full measure,
Running over evermore.

The Lord placed this hymn in my heart at a juncture when I was bemoaning the realization that I am too limited to serve in the capacity that I desire or prefer based on what I've done in the past. I've usually been very involved with our junior high and high school summer camp refered to as SSOT, and this year due to my limitations and my husband's service, I had to let go of those good intentions to be there and recognize that my only place, my only option was to take care of my children and NOT commit to serving in any way. In past years, my husband and I have served with young people together and as the children came, we took turns and traded off so we could still commit part-time or we took our baby, then our toddler along with us...then our toddler and our little baby girl, but now, having two active, walking, talking yet learning to behave children in our care, it's not easy or inconspicuous to be in a meeting with them anymore. And the real issue this year was the camp was help out of town up in the mountains and contrary to my intitial feeling, my husband felt that it was not our portion this year to participate on top of his other service. So, originally I struggled with the Lord...WHY? Why do I have a burden to serve if I must be limited. I'm used to having something to commit to other than at home. I'm a teacher with a job during the year...until now with the third on the way...I know from my personal seeking of the Lord that the struggle is deeper than just the issue at hand with serving or not...it was more like "Lord, I honestly struggle with just staying at home all day with my children...I feel so unproductive, so lost, so tired...so guilty for feeling that way..." These precious and adorable babies are given to me from the Lord to raise and I need to treasure every moment...but it's such a paradox when zealous, good-intentioned mommy meets burnt out, tired haggard, out of patience mommy after the 2nd diaper explosion, the 3rd accident, the 4th tantrum, the 5th time-out, the failed naps, the dumped cereal box and the mounds of messes that reincarnate themselves only moments after I've bent over to clean them. "COUNT IT ALL JOY?" Rejoice in the Lord ALWAYS? HOW? I feel so short. That's what I was telling the Lord earlier this summer. But then, as I opened my heart to Him genuinely in the depths of the distress, I found an oasis of relief...gradually, yet very real, very releasing. A little at a time the Lord is faithful to feed us when we seek Him in those moments of feeling so helpless and condemned for what we are not and cannot do. I was helped by a excerpt from an Emana portion saying that the Lord doesn't ask us to just "Be happy!" and Rejoice in our environment no matter what." He says "Rejoice in the LORD...Always, and AGAIN, I say REJOICE!" We need to be reminded again and again, and I NEEDED that reminder. A few days later the Lord met me faithfully with a portion that exposed my eroneous concept that I'm not useful or productive as a limited mommy at home. What matters is what materials I am building with whatever I do. Gold, pearl and precious stones CAN come out of a day spent with the toddlers...or wood, hay, grass and stubble can be produced by good intentions serving outwardly in the church...what matters is the heart and the saying amen to my portion!
So in all this, the Lord shined that the real indicator to where my heart lies is revealed when my dear husband calls to report that he will in fact be putting in another late late night and don't expect him for dinner or even before bed...and the previously ripe ready response to complain and gripe about my plight is trumped by an almost hard-to-describe sense of thankfulness and grace...and even empowerment to handle the children despite all challenging odds. And that is where the Lord has me now...in the process of taking my portion with thanksgiving...praising for the things He's planned. And honestly, despite my fallen, weak, pregnant tired self, by HIS GRACE, it is possible amidst the obstacles to choose to call and praise...and I believe that is to rejoice in the LORD. He is the fountain in the dry place, leading me to the springs of refreshing water when my parched soul lacks strength. He is my ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE.

Fountain Fun! :)

So, the steady stream of bloggin reports has taken a sabatical and I haven't been updating like I used to...that's not to say that we haven't been keeping busy and making memories and discovering new places this summer. I'll probably start back blogging soon to keep my page updated. But for now, let me say that we discovered a FUN place! A splash pad fountain and farmers market that runs not a far drive from our home...complete with entertainment and fair-like food every Thursday night!

Loving playing in the fountains!

Baby was more reserved and prefered to eat her snack and watch from a distance.

But this one had the time of his life. We will definitely go back!

And this is another reason...AMAZING GOOD FOOD! This is a Jamaican vegan wrap with plaintains and rice and beans. No, I'm not vegan, but the food was sure incredible! See my daughter taking after me chowing down on the rice! :)